Husband no hablo espanol

We have a roof leak in our bedroom. Husband inspected the problem and determined it was a flashing issue. Mikey Fresh gave us a name of a roofer. We called the roofer and he said, "It is too hot to be on the roof." Okay, thanks. So friends of ours gave us a Hispanic roofer's cell phone number. Husband calls him from work and sets up an appointment. Husband calls me and says, "Carlos will be there at 5:15." Well Carlos was a no show. So husband calls the cell phone and Carlos' significant other answers. "ME NO HABLO ENGLISH. SI. SI." Husband, "SI. WHERE IS CARLOS." (very loud) Wife,"more espanol." Husband, "SI. WHERE IS CARLOS?" (louder) Wife, "more espanol" and hung up.

At 6:30 here comes Carlos. Ladder, ready to work. Husband comes inside and says, "Hey his name is Arnold." I ask him where in the world he got Carlos from. "He had a Nextel. I couldn't understand him." I think Arnold told him he was in the CAR with LOS amigos.

Wordless Wednesday #1

10 days

And the countdown begins until BIG SCHOOL. 10 Days! And after a summer of being with son non-stop. I will happily send him! I can't believe his summer is almost over. Kids really don't get that much summer anymore. We will find out his teacher sometime this week by postcard and meet her/him on Monday at 1:00!!!

For those of you that know my friend Karen, her little boy Trey is need of some big prayers. He was hospitalized Saturday with respiratory distress. The doctors are still unsure if it is a virus or asthma. Pray for a speedy recovery.

Rest

Psalms 16:9
No wonder my heart is glad, and I rejoice. My body rests in safety.

Anniversary, Pounds and Bees

Well as you can imagine the Roach house has been busy. Husband and I got a weekend alone for our 7 YEAR ANNIVERSARY. We spent the weekend painting 2 bathrooms. I painted a "chalkboard" in the kid's playroom. Husband put up a chair rail above it and it is super cute. the kids finally wrote on it last night. Son was so excited that he could now write on the walls without getting in trouble. He wrote, "Daddy Rocks! Mommy is a stinky poo poo!" Nice. He then lost privileges and all husband could do was laugh when son wasn't looking.

I am still with the diet(week 3) and working out hard. I am proud to report I have lost almost 12 pounds. And they took my measurements on Tuesday. I have lost 12 inches. 6 in my waist!!! It is a slow process. One pound at a time. I must say that no red meat, no pork, no fried foods and no sweets is starting to grow on me. I made the family hamburgers the other night and me grilled salmon. Husband said, "Does this bother you?" Absolutely not. Just having to make the hamburger patties grossed me out. However, I just did this cleanse for two days. You basically eat 6 0z of protein and lettuce for two days and drink this juice. Anyway, I was a little on edge so I wanted to get out of the house. I made sister run with me to the mall to take something back. When we were leaving, she wanted to stop and get a water at the cinnamon roll place. She ends up getting a box of fresh cinnamon rolls and twists to take home to the kids. I could have killed her. I had to smell that the whole way home. But I will say, she gets more excited then me on weigh in days. My body is in shock and my muscles are spazing out. I was most excited Sunday when I put on a skirt and it slid down off my hips! Please keep me in your prayers. I have made a year commitment and it is a lifestyle change. Pray I do not get obsessed. I downloaded several Prince and Adam Hood songs to my IPOD that seem to be getting me through lots of cardio.

Today was eventful for daughter. I got a call from MDO saying daughter had been stung by a bee. One bee seem to like her and flew into her hair. It got stuck in her hair on her neck. She then tried to pull it out of hair leading to several stings on the hand. By the time I got to the school and got her to the doctor, she looked rough. Thankfully SHE WAS NOT ALLERGIC! If you know my kids, this was a miracle. They did give her a steroid, some chew up pill and 2 suckers for being brave. It has been 7 hours since the sting and her hand is still 2 times its normal size.

On an end note. I married husband seven years ago but I dated him almost 5 years before the actual hitching. Reason # 1, 999 why I married him, I knew one day he would be the kind of daddy he is today. He sent this email out the other day to his guy friends and copied me on it, ENJOY:

Subject: Being a Dad

There's a certain part of your manhood that you lose forever when you find yourself blow drying the hair of your daughter's Barbiedolls.............I lost it tonight. Adam and Joe, your day is coming.Brian, you may have already crossed this bridge and choose to keep it to yourself....its ok, I understand. Chris, you may have managed to dodge this right of passage. I ,for one, will never be the same..............

MILLIE

We kept my new and only niece over night. She scared all the mice away. She is fierce. I want one so bad. I want a little dog. I want an ankle biter. I want to hear little crying and little barking. I want to laugh when something that little growls at you. Husband said no more dogs until one dies. But I think this visit may have changed his mind. . .

2 DOWN

2 DOWN!
But the question is, "How many more to go?"
My husband has caught 2 mice. Little, little mice. He wants me to be excited and feel safe. However, I am now more grossed out and more scared than before. Where are they hiding in the day? Can they see me? And what happens if we catch one with him at work? He let son throw one over the fence with gloves on! I can't tell you how scared I am. I googled my fear. It has a name : Musophobia. But then I got all interested in reading the names of all the phobias. WOW. I feel for all the psychiatrist in the world out there having to diagnose those people. So I diagnosed my family.

Son - Ablutophobia, Arachibutyrophobia
Daughter - Decidophobia
Husband - Caligynephobia(ME), Enochlophobia

Leave me a comment with your fear!

Like mother, Like son

I can't believe I am about to share these stories. So let me talk about son first. On the way home from Knoxville we stopped at a Cracker Barrel to eat supper. Son and daughter love to get candy after dinner at Cracker Barrel. Usually it is the stick sucker things. But on this occasion Big League Chew was the choice. As we were back in the car driving I hear son say, "Oh no!" I turn around and see this . . .

Gum on the eyelid. Gun in the eye lashes. I then have to crawl to the back of the car and try to pull the gum off. Big League Chew . . . very sticky. I then tell husband the only thing I know to do is use peanut butter. He screams NO. Son is allergic and we don't know where the closest hospital is at the time. As son screams at me, I slowly work the gum off his eyelashes with a wet wipe. After I am finished I say, "Why?" His reply, "I thought it would be funny."

Well the apple does not fall far from the tree. I have started a new "diet" along with lots of visits to the gym. I meet with a counselor and a nutritionist. They have convinced me I am one pound away for gastric bypass. I have lost six pounds in a week. I also dreamed the other night I was eating McDonald's french fries with lots of ketchup and woke up in a sweat. So yesterday after running(interval walking/running) 2.5 miles on the treadmill, I decided I needed weights too since I am so OBESE. Well lets just say, I decided to do this thing where you are hanging parallel to the floor by your feet and you have to use your ab muscles to pull you up. Not only was this my first time but I decided I would do it holding a 25 pound weight. NOT A GOOD IDEA. I got stuck. I mean like,stuck, can't move, need assistance, stuck. I muster up enough strength to notice no one is upstairs where I am so I am in the clear with embarrassment. But then I think should I call for help? Answer:"Absolutely NOT." I don't know how long I hung there but I do know I finally decided to drop the weight and kinda fall of the apparatus. I am sure the gym has it on video and if it winds up on America's funniest home video, I will die. Why did I do it? "I thought it was a good idea."

In other news, we have been gone so much lately that we seem to have acquired a new house guest. A MOUSE. My bug man is coming back again today to try to catch the rodent. The kids are scared to go to any room alone. I won't walk in the dark. I am threatening to move until it is captured. It is partying at night which totally grosses me out. My bug man thinks I have no sense. I told him to come today and not plan on leaving until he has it in his hands. I told son to stop playing the Ratatouille video game because I fear the mouse might think we are fond of rodents and we are so not. So son tells daughter if she dresses up with him the mouse will be scared and run away. Here are my rat fighting pair.

A Pearl

ROACH, PEARL "GRANNY" LUCILLE CLABOUGH - age 86 of Knoxville went home to Glory July 2, 2008. She always said she "loves ALL of her children." Preceded in death by husband, Joel Evert Roach; daughter, Pauline George; parents, Ernest & Polly Clabough, several brothers & sisters. Survivors: daughter, Betty Lou Fuller; son & daughter-in-law, Joel E. & Danna Roach; grandchildren: Judy & husband Rick Hyder, Tommy & wife Charlotte Haun, Tim & wife Rhonda Haun, Donna & husband Roger McDonald, Pamela & husband Michael Scott, Kristi & husband Terry Wilhite, Joel N. & wife Marsha Roach, Brenda Nasser, Randall & wife Sommer George; 18 great-grandchildren, 9 great-great-grandchildren; brothers, Edward Clabough, Ray & wife Shelba Clabough, many special friends & extended family. Service 12 noon Saturday West View Wesleyan Church at 3224 Joyce Ave. Pastor Dan Mayhle officiating. Interment to follow at Highland Memorial Cemetery. The body will lie in state one hour prior to the service. Pallbearers: grandsons and great grandsons, Joel "Joey" Roach, Randy George, Channing McDonald, Matthew Sparks, Jonathan Scott, Wesley Scott. Honorary pallbearers, Tommy & Tim Haun. In lieu of flowers memorials may be made to West View Wesleyan Church. The family will receive friends 6 to 8 pm Friday at Mynatt Funeral Home Fountain City. Published in the Knoxville News Sentinel from 7/3/2008 - 7/4/2008.

The family and I made a difficult trip. Husband had no words to describe his loss. He always said he married me so I would talk for him. This was the first time in our marriage, I had to. Granny was the "pearl" of the family. Tough to crack but precious and priceless on the inside. The preacher shared a story from a few years ago when he was talking to Granny. He said with tears coming down her cheeks she told him her body was no good and there was not much she could do for the church but she could make wash clothes. She knitted wash clothes for everyone. I have a stack of wash clothes. Some I never opened, for God had told me long ago I would treasure it. The preacher then pulled out a wash cloth from his pocket. I think everyone in that church began to cry. We all have those wash clothes at our house. He then told of how Granny would send them to the church for them to sell or use for whatever reason. He told how the wash clothes that were sold went to help with missions and went to help with paying a young man's tuition. You see Granny didn't just believe and have faith. She believed also in good works.

James 2:26 (New Living Translation)
26 Just as the body is dead without breath, so also faith is dead without good works

It really is that simple. We think we have nothing to offer our churches, our communities, our neighbor, our families and our friends. It is not about what money we don't have or do have. It is not about what time we have or don't have. It is not about what we can't do or could do. It is about what we want to do. It is about just wanting to do good works because we were bought with a price. A price we don't and didn't deserve. A price we can't and don't have to pay back.

A washrag. What is that reason you are not serving? What is that reason you can't help? What is that reason you are not giving?

Granny Roach

Granny Roach died this morning.

She was with her children and now she is HOME.

We will be going to Knoxville in the morning. Leave it to Granny Roach to have fireworks on her burial day. Happy 4th of July!

Come to think of it, that is a good idea. Someone pass out sparklers at my funeral.

Prayers to Husband and his family.